Certificate of Feelings Toward Him Bureau of Relationships
Scrapbook-style collage on cream paper: a hand-drawn rotary phone with a speech bubble, a torn pink paper heart, a hand-drawn wristwatch, a pressed yellow flower on floral washi tape, a hand-drawn cloud with rising bubbles, small hand-drawn hearts and stars, a blank torn note card, and a circular stamped seal with a star, scattered with striped washi tape and pastel star stickers.

Certificate of Feelings Toward Him

to be completed in your own hand

Processing time: 5 min Items: 18

No sign-up. Issued the same day.

This certificate is issued on the strength of an 18-item test and certifies which of five states — drawn to the attention, plain liking, building infatuation, steady attachment, or settled love — the bearer’s own current answers toward one specific person place highest, with the classification and its basis on record. Nothing here reads the other side of things; this certificate reports only what the bearer’s own answers show. Processing time: about 5 minutes.

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Weekend plans come together and he's the one who invites you along. What actually lifts your mood?
A friend asks you to describe him honestly, flaws included. What comes out?
You catch yourself wondering what he's up to on an ordinary afternoon. How specific does that get?
Picture someone else starting to text and notice you exactly the way he does. Does the feeling hold up?
Compared with your closest friend, how does your fondness for him actually compare?
Setting aside how things are formally defined right now, do you want this to become more?
Have you ever stopped and asked yourself if this is really different from friendship?
Something of yours needs rearranging for him. How does that compare with doing it for a close friend?
A stranger who's never met him asks about him. What comes out, unprompted?
In the stretch of time right before you expect to hear from him, what's going on internally?
A few days pass with no word from him at all. Does your sense of counting on him hold?
Compare how you feel now to the last time it clearly peaked. What's changed?
Nothing exciting is happening this week — just an ordinary lull. Does the closeness hold up?
Think about the calm, comfortable side of this and the charged, urgent side. Are they the same thing?
Picture an ordinary daydream about a year from now. Does he show up in it on his own?
You just had an ordinary disagreement with him. What happens to your engagement right after?
Making room for him in your week — is that still a choice you notice making?
A big life decision that seems unrelated to him comes up. Does it get checked against him anyway?

The certificate will be issued in this name. Leave it blank to issue it to the bearer.

About This Certificate

Measures the current placement of the bearer's own thought, feeling, and behavior toward one specific person, from attention-driven interest through liking, an early romantic charge, dependable attachment, and settled love.

Test author Editorial Staff

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Attachments

Attachment 1. Methodology

Eighteen questions build the five states from a handful of underlying contrasts: whether he already has a place in how the bearer pictures the future, whether any romantic charge on record is still new or has cooled into something steadier, and whether the warmth described belongs to ordinary liking or to the fuller, loving register. Each of the five states is a distinct combination of these readings, and the result reports whichever one is currently ahead.

The scope stays narrow throughout: only the bearer's present thinking, feeling, and conduct toward this one man are scored, never a broader pattern of relating, never anything about what he thinks or intends, and never a forecast of where the two of them end up. None of the five states outranks another — a reading that lands early or modest is every bit as ordinary, and every bit as accurate, as one that lands on the fuller end.

This is a single self-report pass, not a fixed-trait measurement, and every answer here is self-reported rather than observed. With five closely related states scored across eighteen questions, the leading state and its nearest neighbor can end up separated by very little — a single answer, in some cases — so a result names the current lean, not a locked-in classification. Retaking the test after some time, or on a different day, is expected to move the reading around rather than expose an earlier mistake.

Further reading: the original Liking Scale and Love Scale the liking/loving distinction above is built on.

This is not a diagnostic instrument.

Attachment 2. Frequently Asked Questions

What's the actual difference between liking him and loving him?

The two aren't the same feeling at different strengths — they belong to different categories altogether. Liking means real, clear-eyed warmth toward him as a person, with no romantic stake attached. Loving adds a charge on top of that, plus a connection sturdy enough to need no excitement to keep functioning. This certificate places the bearer's current responses within that split for this one relationship — it does not generalize to feelings at large.

How can I tell if this is about him, or mostly about being noticed?

Wanting to be seen or chosen can feel exactly like caring about one particular person — the two sensations blur together easily, and that's an ordinary mix-up, not a red flag. What this test checks is whether the good feeling stays tied to him by name or would just as easily transfer to someone else offering the same notice. Whichever way it lands, the feeling behind it is equally genuine.

Is what I feel love, or just attachment and habit?

Steady bonding and the fuller, charged version of love don't describe one state under two names — the two are treated as distinct, separately measurable readings. A dependable connection can feel completely solid without carrying that early spark, while love, as scored here, needs the spark and the bond both present at once. Neither one counts as the watered-down version of the other.

How do I know if this is love or still a building crush?

Strength of feeling isn't the tiebreaker here — how settled it is, and whether it already reaches into the future, is. A crush is simply the earlier chapter: intense, hard to think past, but without much sense yet of where it's going. Love builds on that by adding a bond that holds steady and a future that already has him written into it.

Can this test explain why I feel this way about him?

No — this test reports where things currently stand, not the backstory behind how they got there. Why a feeling like this took hold is bound up in the bearer's own particular history, and that's not something eighteen self-reported answers are built to explain.

Attachment 3. References
  1. Rubin, Z. (1970). Measurement of romantic love. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 16(2), 265–273. doi:10.1037/h0029841
  2. Langeslag, S. J. E., Muris, P., & Franken, I. H. A. (2013). Measuring romantic love: Psychometric properties of the Infatuation and Attachment Scales. Journal of Sex Research, 50(8), 739–747. doi:10.1080/00224499.2012.714011
  3. Sternberg, R. J. (1986). A triangular theory of love. Psychological Review, 93(2), 119–135. doi:10.1037/0033-295X.93.2.119
  4. Hatfield, E., & Sprecher, S. (1986). Measuring passionate love in intimate relationships. Journal of Adolescence, 9(4), 383–410. doi:10.1016/S0140-1971(86)80043-4